|I can't think of anything funny here.|
|Our hero is Robert Ryan, as a brilliant but renegade|
pilot who refuses to wear his earphones correctly.
(Sorry for the borrowed joke.)
|On board his flight is the Maytag repairman ...|
|... future Bat Masterson and his fiancee ...|
|... George Bailey's mother ...|
|... and Lassie's master, Timmy.|
|Also aboard is Anita Ekberg as a party girl. She is|
upset because the airline charged her extra fare
for her eyebrows.
|And finally, there is a condemned man onboard. He is|
being put to death for impersonating Marlon Brando.
|"Make him an offer he cannot refuse." |
|The flight is delightful ...|
|... even though one of the flight attendants walks off the job.|
|The plane makes a forced landing in an extremely isolated|
place where no man dares to enter -- Cher's back yard.
|"The horror. The horror."|
|"Please, God, let Anita Ekberg be my stepmother."|
|Everyone begins to bond. Ryan offers to let one of|
Ekberg's eyebrows fly free.
|And Bat Masterson's fiancee likes the co-pilot's|
|This leads to an argument about whose boyfriend is cuter.|
|But wait! There is a dark hand pushing aside artificial leaves,|
which is the universal symbol of the headhunter.
|"I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody|
instead of a bum, which is what I am."
|The passengers work together to try and throw the plane|
into the air. There is only one working engine, so some
passengers will have to stay behind to keep the weight down.
|"Sorry, kid, but it's either you or me."|
|No, just kidding. The group takes a vote on who will|
be left behind, and the decision is unanimous.
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