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| I can't think of anything funny here. |
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| Our hero is Robert Ryan, as a brilliant but renegade pilot who refuses to wear his earphones correctly. (Sorry for the borrowed joke.) |
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| On board his flight is the Maytag repairman ... |
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| ... future Bat Masterson and his fiancee ... |
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| ... George Bailey's mother ... |
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| ... and Lassie's master, Timmy. |
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| Also aboard is Anita Ekberg as a party girl. She is upset because the airline charged her extra fare for her eyebrows. |
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| And finally, there is a condemned man onboard. He is being put to death for impersonating Marlon Brando. |
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| "Make him an offer he cannot refuse." |
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| The flight is delightful ... |
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| ... even though one of the flight attendants walks off the job. |
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| The plane makes a forced landing in an extremely isolated place where no man dares to enter -- Cher's back yard. |
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| "The horror. The horror." |
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| "Please, God, let Anita Ekberg be my stepmother." |
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| Everyone begins to bond. Ryan offers to let one of Ekberg's eyebrows fly free. |
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| And Bat Masterson's fiancee likes the co-pilot's landing gear. |
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| This leads to an argument about whose boyfriend is cuter. |
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| But wait! There is a dark hand pushing aside artificial leaves, which is the universal symbol of the headhunter. |
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| "I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody instead of a bum, which is what I am." |
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| The passengers work together to try and throw the plane into the air. There is only one working engine, so some passengers will have to stay behind to keep the weight down. |
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| "Sorry, kid, but it's either you or me." |
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| No, just kidding. The group takes a vote on who will be left behind, and the decision is unanimous. |
